Keep Calm and Bounce Back
|photographer Gregory 'Chuil' William from Retrospek|
creative director and stylist - Gracia 'GC' Christabella
tick tock tick tock .. the time is ticking! I'm in my 37 weeks now! OEHMJI!! within around two or three weeks to go, or less! or more!! our little bundle of joy is going to invade the world HOHOHO :D
it feels like yesterday when we were clueless looking at those two stripes on the test pack and now we just went back from our maternity tour class .. yup! we signed up for the express Antenatal Class that provided from the hospital and today was the first session whereby they brought us around and showed us the delivery suite, the post natal ward, patient service centres, operating theatre, .. basically all the places and basic information due to the delivery day .. it was kinda' funny looking at a group of mommies who were wobbling like a penguin here and there during the tour, .... and yes including me!! say hello to mommy penguin!!!! :D
lately I've been receiving similar questions like ...
"how do you feel right now?"
"deg - degan ga sih?"
"are you going to give birth anytime soon? look that your belly is so big now!"
"ntar mau lahiran normal apa ga?"
"who's going to look after your baby?"
"are you going to do the confinement?"
"is your mom going to come?"
"udah siap belom nih?"
"berapa lama lagi sih? ha?! 3 minggu lagi .. cepet yaaa"
"udah siap belom nih?"
and I keep answering with the same answers over and over again ...feel irritated?! nope!! honestly I don't mind! people just being concern so why should I get irritated! :) but call me one drama mama,... with so little time but so much things to do, I was in my very bad mood last week! maybe the right term to use in this kind of situation is "kan cheong spider", a singaporean term used to describe a person who is always anxious and constantly on their toes ... breathe, gillian! *inhale exhale inhale exhale*
I was super cranky last week, .. semua orang kena dijutekin ya termasuk si abang! kayak mendadak hal - hal kecil yang ga sesuai sama keinginan gw bikin keki, belom ditambah jalan juga susah sekarang yak! niat hati mah pengennya aktif kesana kesini, ngerjain ini itu tapi kondisi fisik yang ga memungkinkan bikin kesel sendiri ...
being kan cheong and try to calm down is one thing but being kan cheong and do nothing is like do'oh! so I choose to calm myself, jot down my to-do-list, and do my best to embrace this journey .. ya walopun kadang masih diselipin acara misuh - mish juga! HOHOHO .. maklum ya aku ini masih manusia biasa, kakak!! ;) what a chim word; embrace!! btw, am I teaching another singlish term here or what?! chim is a Hokkien word that can be translated as "deep" that has been used locally here to explain something "difficult" ... anyway, as deep as it sounds, what else you want or you can do with this kind of situation (read: body aching, sleepless night, legs cramp, heart burn, swollen feet ... the list go on and on HOHOHO) rather then embrace it! yo go girl!! *menyemangati diri sendiri*
KEEP CALM AND BOUNCE BACK!!!! that's the spirit!!!!
in my honest opinion, the third trimester is the most challenging time after all. we've been talking about 'endurance' in our youth community in church and when it comes to walk the talk it's not that easy .. pregnancy is the right method to teach me about endurance! but once again not by my own might and strength but by the spirit of the Lord who enable me to go through this ... I also thank God for my supportive partner, abang!! there are times when we both are tired and agitated with each other but at the end of the day he always there for me, giving all the support though how I really wish I could let him carry the bump for a while and enjoy my deep sleep HOHOHO ...
last friday was the day where I felt so damn tired! juggling between work, pregnancy, and on top of that we had argument on the night before! oh dear!!... ya basically everything! I was whatsapp-ing with abang during lunch time and couldn't stop crying at the same time .. and abang asked me whether I wanted to go to the prayer meeting on that night with him and I directly said no, but somehow actually I knew that was what I needed the most but I just refused to do it .. abang said, "aku tau gee rasanya .. kamu yakin kalo di rumah kamu bisa better? kalo kamu yakin ya ga usah dateng tonight. you actually know what you are supposed to do but don't feel like doing it .. bener ga ya? apa aku sotoy?" ...
finally I decided to go! not because he asked me to go but because I knew that I needed God the most during this time. super glad I chose the right thing!! I was crying and crying during the prayer time, pouring out everything inside my heart and I could feel His gentleness touched my heart ... and that was my bounce back moment!! well, the swollen feet were still there but it won't stop me to continue and embrace this journey ..
"life is not about how fast you run, or how high you climb, but how well you bounce"